Are you concerned about your children’s faith and whether they truly know Jesus personally? We do our best with Sunday School, Christian camps, memory verses, and family devotions, yet we hear the statistics and see the stories of teenagers who grow up in church only to drift away in their young adult years.
Here’s a question you may have been avoiding: “Does my child actually know Jesus personally or do they just know about Him?”
A blogger mum had that moment one night, after family devotions, when she asked her daughter a simple question: “Why do you think Jesus loves you?” After a brief hesitation, her daughter said, “Because I try to be good.” The mum’s heart sank. Her daughter knew all the major Bible stories and sang worship songs enthusiastically. But somehow, she’d missed the most foundational truth—that Jesus loves her not because of her performance but because of His grace.
Knowing About Jesus vs. Knowing Jesus
This distinction isn’t new. The Pharisees could quote vast portions of Scripture, yet Jesus said they didn’t really know God (John 5:39-40). Judas spent years in close proximity to Jesus but never truly followed Him. The crowds listened eagerly to Jesus’ teaching but walked away when it became personal.
Biblical literacy matters. Scripture memorization matters. Praying matters. But they’re not the substance of faith—they’re the scaffolding around it.
True Christian faith is fundamentally relational. Children need more than Bible facts. Jesus didn’t say, “This is eternal life: that they know facts about You.” He said, “This is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent” John 17:3. Note the phrase “that they know you …” That’s the clincher!
Why So Many Children Become Uncertain or Non-Committal
Research from Barna and others has shown that young people rarely leave the faith because their church lacked fun programs. The far more common reason? They never developed a personal, meaningful connection with Jesus.
They grew up in church-centered environments rather than with Christ-centred relationships. They were taught Christian habits but not how to cultivate Christian hope. And they learned the stories of Scripture but not how to hear the Shepherd’s voice (John 10:27).
Faith that stays external, merely performed, repeated, or inherited, cannot carry a child through doubt, questions, or the challenges of adulthood. But faith that becomes internal, lived, experienced, and personally cherished, develops resilience.
How Do We Help a Child’s Faith Become Personal?
The good news is that parents are uniquely positioned to help children encounter Jesus relationally, not just intellectually. Here are four ways to begin:
1. Shift from “learning about God” to “talking with God.”
Many children think prayer is a script: formal, pressured, and “correct.” But prayer is meant to be a personal conversation.
Ask your child, “What do you want to tell Jesus about your day?”
Ask, “What do you want to ask Him right now?”
Normalize the expression of feelings, fears, gratitude, and curiosity.
Children learn to pray by praying with someone who talks to God as if He’s present (which He is).
2. Invite questions—even the hard ones.
Parents often panic when children ask theological questions. But questions aren’t signs of weak faith—they’re signs of forming faith.
When children are encouraged to ask, seek, and wrestle, they learn that God’s big enough for their doubts. And when you don’t know the answer, it’s perfectly okay to say, “Let’s explore that together.”
Faith grows through exploration.
3. Teach the heart of the Gospel, not just the stories of Scripture.
Bible stories are wonderful, but without context, they can become disconnected moral tidbits. Don’t just teach what happened. Teach why it matters.
“Daniel trusted God because God was with him.”
“Jesus calmed the storm to show His disciples He is trustworthy.”
“Jesus died and rose again because He loves you and wants you to belong to Him forever.”
Truth becomes transformative when children get to see Jesus in the story.
4. Create consistent rhythms that lead to encounter.
Children experience God not only through church attendance but through repeated, relational practices at home:
- Daily devotions that invite personal reflection
- Family prayer that is conversational, not formal
- Scripture reading that connects to daily life
- Testimonies of how God is working in your life
Children learn what a relationship with God looks like by watching you live it.
The Beautiful Surprise of Personal Faith
Several months after the blogger mum had the conversation with her daughter, she came to her with a smile and said, “Mom, I talked to Jesus about something today, and it made me feel better.” Not because she’d memorized another verse, tried to earn God’s approval, or done something good. But because she’d learned to turn to the Shepherd who loves her.
That’s the goal. Not perfect behaviour, impressive knowledge, or flawless church attendance. A living, breathing friendship with Jesus Christ.
Your Child Needs More Than Bible Trivia
In a world that’s increasingly confusing and spiritually contested, our children need genuine, experiential faith. They need to hear Jesus’ voice for themselves. They need to know His character, compassion, forgiveness, and indwelling presence.
Our role as parents, more than teaching Bible stories, is to guide them to the Storyteller. Because when a child knows Jesus personally, not just intellectually, faith doesn’t evaporate in adolescence. It deepens, flourishes, remains.
To learn more about how to help your child know Jesus personally, read the related articles.
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Summary
When children grow up knowing Bible facts but never developing a personal relationship with Jesus, they’ll likely leave the church as they enter adulthood. External practices, such as Sunday School and Scripture memorization, while they may support, can’t stand in for a living connection with Christ. To help your child know Jesus personally, parents must encourage honest prayer, invite questions, teach the heart of the Gospel, and model relational devotion. When children come to know Jesus rather than merely know about Him, their faith becomes resilient, enduring, and life-giving.
FAQ 1. What is the difference between knowing about Jesus and knowing Jesus personally?
Knowing about Jesus involves learning Bible stories, facts, and Christian teachings. Knowing Jesus personally means having a real, relational faith that involves talking with Him, trusting Him, and experiencing His presence. John 17:3 describes eternal life as knowing God and Jesus Christ in this relational way, not just intellectually.
FAQ 2. Why do some children raised in church drift away from their faith?
Many children drift from faith because their experience of Christianity remains external rather than personal. Research and experience suggest that while church programs are valuable, they’re not enough on their own. Without a developing relationship with Jesus, faith can remain inherited habits rather than a lived, internal conviction.
FAQ 3. How can parents help their children develop a personal relationship with Jesus?
Parents can encourage personal faith by modelling conversational prayer, welcoming questions, and focusing on the meaning of Scripture rather than just Bible stories. Creating simple daily rhythms, such as family prayer, reflection, and sharing how God is at work, helps children experience Jesus as real, present, and relational.
© Scripture Union, 2026
2 Corinthians 4:5
One Response
Absolutely. Very well said. Parents are best placed in the plan of God to share the good news of the gospel to their children. All other avenues can only build on the firm foundations laid by the parents.
Parents having a personal / individual relationship with God and then allowing that to impact their own relationship with each other AND THEN collectively impacting the childrens life will ensure the children developing a delightful relationship with God.
We parents cannot give what we do not have.